thanksgiving weekend

It is Sunday morning and the only reason I am up at this time is because I got an email to my phone that woke me up, from my legal writing professor that he posted our grades for an assignment. It's not the final grade, but at least it's a grade, for our second of four total assignments and I have been waiting anxiously to see whether my grade has improved from my first assignment. I got a 75. I feel like doing a dance! A 75 in law school is equivalent to a B. And it's a whole letter grade better than my first assignment. So, even though it was really nice and warm and comfortable just curled up in my new fuzzy bathrobe my parents got me, now I can't go back to sleep.



So anyway, I managed to spend Thanksgiving weekend with my family. It was not easy, but I got through it. I haven't forgotten to be grateful for everything I have, but I think I have an easier time being grateful when I am away from them. We are just so different. Our views are so different. And all of us have a really hard time communicating through our differences to one another. I know that they mean well, and in the end we all love each other, but we are all so absolutely and completely different and it's hard to get past that...

Here's a picture of me and my 60 year old father:

I still enjoyed trying to find the right gift for my dad, even though we failed miserably and ended up just having a nice dinner in Tahoe. The highlight for me was the Run to Feed the Hungry race (my first!) in the pouring rain, and all the turkey and fix ins I cooked and shared with friends. And I am glad now that Thanksgiving is over, we can get on with Christmas, and get the holidays over with. I like the season of the holidays without all the stress that comes with it. Besides, my favorite holiday is New Year's, where we can start all over and start fresh.


The race was amazing. In previous years, I had only watched, but this year I finally got to run the 10K. It was pouring rain when we got up in the morning, but I finished making the turkey, made all the fix ins, and then jumped on our bikes and braved the rain. Paul kept looking at me and pointed at the sky, as if to say, we're really doing this? But we both knew we were going for it.

We rode right onto the Sac State campus and barely registered in time to make it to the start line as the gun went off. I was impressed that most of the 26,000 registrants showed up, despite the weather. It was great. I couldn't break out into an actual run for most of the race because it was just so crowded, but I still managed to keep a 9 minute mile pace and finished in just under an hour. I was especially impressed at all the kids I saw out there, and one time a woman dropped her keys and immediately a loud chorus of people screaming "Keys! Keys! You dropped your keys!" got her attention and she turned around and got her keys. It was really sweet. There were plenty of people running with costumes on. I really liked the turkey hats, and I think I want to get one for myself for next year.

Towards the end of the race, I started getting really excited. With the rain in my eyes, my clothes drenched, and the finish line barely visible off in the distance, I started shouting "Yahoo! Way to go runners! Great job everybody!" and gave myself goosebumps. It was such an awesome feeling, running alongside all those people in the rain and getting closer and closer to the finish line. It was the best part of my Thanksgiving this year. This is Paul and me after finishing:

My turkey this year was not that bad, either. I think it definitely improved from last year. Last year I threw bacon all over the bird and hoped that would be enough to keep the meat moist. This year, I made sure to cook it at a lower heat for longer, and basted it with a yummy, tangy, spicy bbq sauce I made from scratch with raw honey every hour to keep the meat moist. That sauce made up for the turkey not being as moist. I almost gagged when I cleaned that turkey though. It's been a while since I cooked meat, Paul and I have been pretty good about staying pescatarian and not eat any meat. So when I was preparing it, I was trying my darnest to forget that this thing was alive and running around at some point. This is food being made at 6 AM on the morning of Thanksgiving Day:

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I've been thinking a lot about myself and how I can improve as a person. Definitely in the last few months, I have become unhappy. And this has affected my overall ability to shake little things off. I feel like my equilibrium has been shot, and I am having a harder time recovering from little things that I would normally know to shake off. And no one is particularly keen on cutting me any slack. So I gotta work on fixing this. Because I can't walk around being a grump everywhere I go. I'm trying to find the exact source of my unhappiness and looking for ways to rectify that. I don't think resorting to comfort foods and flipping through gossip magazines will help me to escape the unhappiness I'm feeling. I've been doing some irregular things, thinking it will relieve me of my unhappiness, and I don't think it's working. Hopefully I'll figure it out before the end of this year and start the next year happier and refreshed. I need to work on balancing my equilibrium and being a source of cheerfulness, not grumpiness. No one likes a grouch.

gift searching for my dad's 60th

My brother and I are having the hardest time finding the right gift(s) for my dad. So far, we've thought of a motorcyle complete with motercycle lessons, a puppy, or an expensive watch, reservations on a pheasant farm so he can hunt, luxury hotel room for two for the weekend in Tahoe, a macbook pro, karaoke machine... the list goes on.

So far he's said no to pretty much most of the things on this list. Either that, or my mom doesn't want us to "encourage" him. For one reason or another, nothing seems quite right. Plus, he is impossible to please. I think so far, he's settled on going skeet shooting the morning of his birthday. My brother and I are still trying to figure out what else to do. I already purchased an original art piece from our artist friend, Bernard Treanton, but we are looking for more.

While looking for a possible puppy to adopt, both of our hearts broke. There are some really cute puppies out there without a home. My heart hurts when I look through their pictures. Who would abandon these beautiful animals? It's sick.

After my whole episode with Rufus, I vowed I will never get another pet for as long as I live. It just hurts too much when you lose them. No one will know the bond I had with Rufus. That rabbit was my son. Nothing will ever compare to the love I shared with Rufus.


But seeing these websites full of so many dogs that need homes, I can't just sit here and do nothing. It's seriously worth buying a house if I can have one of these puppies to come home to. All my problems would be solved. Something to think about...

If anyone has any genius ideas for a 60 year old birthday boy, please let me know. His birthday is this Saturday, and we're running out of time!!!!

update on this and that

With only one more official night of class left to go, the anxiety of finals has hit me hard. Here is my game plan for the next two weeks:

1) update my outlines for all of my classes and commit them to memory
2) take 4- 6 more practice exams or until I run out of practice exams per class (I've already done two for each class)
3) finish making flashcards and commit those to memory
4) read again my supplement books
5) try to stay alive



Even though I shudder at the thought of the next two weeks, I know that it will go by fast, and I have some fun things to look forward to. Things like, another Thanksgiving dinner with my loving family, my 4th marathon, a concert with my brother, holiday shopping, and planning for our trip to Honduras. So I have to go hard for a few more weeks and then I will be free to enjoy a month of relaxation and fun before the next semester starts. And I refuse to think about what that will be like.

A friend told me at work today that I am high strung. He's probably right. I'm high strung now because there is so much going on. The next 3 years of my life looks so bleak right now, I can't see the light at the end of this tunnel yet. And, I am depriving myself of frozen yogurt so I just want to throw tantrums all the time. Either that, or go to sleep so no one has to hear me bitch. It's sad.

I was on my eliptical machine today and started staring at the stack of books sitting in a corner that I never got to touch after starting law school. As I moved back and forth on the machine, drenched in sweat all over my face and body, I stared longingly at those piles of books. I imagined reaching out and touching the cover of it, and smelling the smell of old pages, and feeling the weight of the book in my hands. I miss leisure reading so much. Three more years. If I play my cards right. Three more years....

guns should be banned

So... I've tried to steer my entries clear of political leanings, but it is inevitable. The things I read and see often get me fired up and I might as well tell it the way I see it.

http://www.sacbee.com/2011/11/15/4054755/chp-poi-poi-upoi-upoi-upoi.html
This is a news article about a truck driving man at the end of his rope and commits suicide by cop.
After reading this story, I couldn't help but feel the need to point out that this is another example of why we should ban guns.

This man was clearly troubled and had a lot of issues, but he was issued a concealed weapons permit. He cleared all background tests that were required, and was given the permit. Because of this "right", another man is dead, and an officer is seriously injured from gunshot wounds and possibly disabled for the rest of his life.

The United States experiences epidemic levels of gun violence, claiming over 30,000 lives annually, according to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. For every person who dies from a gunshot wound, two others are wounded. Every year, more than 100,000 Americans are victims of gun violence. In addition to those who are killed or injured, there are countless others whose lives are forever changed by the deaths of and injuries to their loved ones.

Every hour in the U.S., 3 people die from gun violence.

Felons somehow get their gun rights back. Crazy people go crazy and shoot people. Normal people who have guns go crazy and shoot people.

We no longer need to hunt for food. Why do we need guns?

Last year, the night before Veteran's Day, I got held up at gun-point with three other people and one of them was seriously injured (21 stitches to the ear). We were held up by two young kids in hooded sweatshirts with guns. They pointed the guns at us and told us to empty our pockets. Actually, I think that's what they said- I don't actually remember hearing words. I just remember seeing the gun in my face. The world stopped. My hands went up. My mouth became dry. Everything was in slow motion. It was not cool.

Would it have helped the situation if we had guns too and we had a big shoot out? Someone said, sure, if they didn't have bullets, but we did, we could have shot and caught them.
But what if they did have bullets? If we pulled our guns out, they would most certainly shoot back. It could have been a blood bath.

Why does anyone have to have guns?


These are my top reasons for why I am against guns.


1. They are too dangerous. A person can get really hurt getting into a fight, but after a fight, you can live to see another day. But a gun can be a little thing you can carry in your pocket and it can put a hole in your brain, your heart, your stomach, and it's just too much power for one person to carry around.


2. As humans, none of us are "stable". We get emotional, because that is what humans do. When you're angry or sad, and you have a gun, you feel like using it. I don't care how rational you think you are, we all have our emotional ups and downs. If you are likely to purchase and own a gun, you are likely to think about using it every excuse you have.


3. Accidents happen all the time- having a gun increases the chances of a gun-related accident. You might think you're responsible and doing everything right- but what about that curious kid that gets into your drawer and accidently drops it or sets it off?



4. Other countries who have banned it get along just fine, and have very low gun violence statistics. Iceland and Denmark are two of the top ten countries with the lowest murder rates and they completely ban all firearms. In Iceland all hand guns are banned, you have to be at least 20 years old to be able to buy and use a riffle or shotgun, and each year you have to enter a lottery that determines if you get a hunting permit that year. In Denmark hand guns are also banned unless you are licensed, and you can only get that license if you compete in tournaments, and the guns have to be kept in a safe at the club where you practice.
In order to get a permit to own a riffle you have to participate in a course that takes 3 months to complete, and you have to be at least 20 years old.



5. Washington DC's low murder rate of 69 per 100,000 is due to strict gun control.



6. Rifles and handguns aren't necessary to national defense! Of course, the army has hundreds of thousands of them. I can see how if we lived in a country that wasn't democratic, we would have a need for guns, but we spend how much on our military? I think they got the national security thing covered.



7. "Assault weapons" have no purpose other than to kill large numbers of people. The police need assault weapons. You do not.



8. A majority of the population supports gun control, just like a majority of the population supported owning slaves. So it's not a good argument to say that because most people support it, it means that it's right.



9. The Brady Bill and the Assault Weapons Ban, both of which went into effect in 1994 are responsible for the decrease in violent crime rates, which have been declining since 1991.



10. And lastly, because having a gun does not make you more sexy or cool. No, really, it doesn't.

Stinson Beach 25K and some new fitness goals

Ok, so my blogging habit is dwindling. Finals are approaching, and I really don't have time to think about blogging. But I am getting requests to keep up with it, so I will try.

Two weeks ago, I fell running and fractured my ribs. It hurt. It still hurts, but it's calmed down into a dull pain that I can deal with. Only when I laugh really hard or when I lie down, I can feel it hurting, but at least it doesn't hurt everytime I breathe anymore. God, that was awful.



What was crazy about this though is that it happened 5 days before my 25K race at Stinson Beach. Everyone and their mom was trying to talk me out of it. And honestly, if it hurt too much while I was running the race, I had every intention of quitting or walking the rest of the way. But I wasn't going to give up without at least trying. And luckily, I was fine!

I ran like a soldier and finished that thing. It was awesome.

So Paul and I drove into the little town of Stinson Beach and met up with his family- his brother Chuck, nieces Patti and Jenny, and Patti's man, Mike. We all rented a beach house in Stinson and just had a blast that whole weekend. It was great seeing them all. I hadn't seen them since the Bix run in July.

We did some sight seeing in the city, ate at one of my favorite restaurants, Gordon Biersch, and spent most of our time talking, hanging out, and dining at the local restaurant, Sand Dollar. They treated us well.


There's a big, friendly golden retriever that greets you on the porch, and there's a live jazz band playing for dinner each night. Their menu offers a variety of pasta dishes, clam chowder, oysters on the half shell, and steamed mussels. I recommend this place for anyone who wants to experience a smalltown, neighborly dining experience with fresh seafood prepared in many different ways.

The rest of the town is really cute and quiet. A little grocery store that sells locally made gourmet cheeses, freshly churned milk (with cream still floating at the top, sold in glass jars), and other local goods like that. They have a surfer store, a really good breakfast/coffee shop, and a few random gift shops with interesting little knick knacks.

Our beach house was fully equipped with everything you can imagine, from surf boards, cruisers, a game room that included foozball and a pool table, kayaks, to little buddha statues, among other odditites that were curious and strange. We tried to take advantage of everything that beach house had to offer, but mainly, we were there for the race.

The race was spectacular. It started right on the beach, and the timing was very informal (as in, no chip time). This was probably the smallest organized run I've ever participated in, and it was special and thrilling in its own way.
What most people won't understand is that this race is not just an ordinary race. It involves an elevation gain of at least 1,000 feet- all uphill, up, in, and over a mountain.

So you start from the water, and you run up the mountain. Up, up, up. And then down into Muir Woods. And then up some more. Here is a ladder you have to climb somewhere after mile 3.



It took me a little over 3 hours to do it, but it was so satisfying, I definitely want to do it again. The hills were initially frustrating, but afterwards, the feeling of accomplishing running up those hills is really rewarding.

Plus, trail running is really great. You are running through the beautiful redwoods, seeing and smelling and feeling the freshness of the forest, and if you get enough distance away from the people behind you, you are able to enjoy running through the woods in total solitude. It's an amazingly peaceful feeling, and you feel at one with nature.

Here's a view you can catch on the trail:



It's a breathtaking view as you run along this trail. Whether you run it or hike it, I definitely recommend that you check it out.

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On another note, I've decided to lose some weight. I've gotten a little soft in the last few months and I'm starting to feel unhappy about the way I look. I've known this now for weeks, but it became a whole different matter when someone actually pointed it out. I'll be damned if I get called "fat" ever again for as long as I live! So no more frozen yogurt, and no more cookies. Co-workers, if you're reading this, please kindly refrain from shoving an endless train of desserts down my throat every single day we are at work. I know work is tough, but cookies and pie every day is not going to help us get through it any easier. Ok, that wasn't fair. I know it's nobody's fault but my own, but it's so. damn. hard. to say no to a whole table full of desserts every day, it's like the Fat Devil is calling out to me every single day with its evil, sugary temptations.

This part of my entry is in no way an attempt to fish for compliments or to seek reassurance about my figure. I know I'm not fat. I'm just not as tight and toned as I'd like to be. So no reassurance needed. I know exactly what my goal is, and I know that it's still within a healthy realm of what's proportionate to my height. I'm 5'2" so the slightest bit of extra weight looks a whole lot worse than if I was taller.

Weight is such a sensitive issue. I worked my ass off to get to my current size, but it's still raw and sensitive. I was surprised at how hurtful a passing comment was, and how raw and painful it still felt after all these years of overcoming my body insecurities.

So I went out and got an elliptical machine (that doubles as a stationary bike), some weights, and will not use the excuse of "being too busy" to neglect my fitness. Of course I've been running, but I haven't done any strength training since summer. I truly don't have time to go to the gym, so I thought I'll bring the gym to me. So I've invested in some home equipment and plan on getting back into better shape. And I've started counting my calories again, so we'll see if I can hit my goal before this next marathon on Dec. 4th.

                  

Here's a pic of me looking about 10 pounds "softer" than I'd like :(



Time to tighten up.

magic of ashland

Wow, can't believe so many weeks have gone by since I blogged already. This is what I feared. But law school homework and work takes precedence over all, so blogging must wait.

What I do want to share for now is the amazing weekend I just had in Ashland, Oregon. We went up to experience the Oregon Shakespeare Festival for Paul's birthday weekend extravaganza and it was wonderful.



So much culture. So much creativity, and so much talent. Those young actors were truly something. We drove up on Friday and got there just in time to check into our hotel room at Lithia Springs Spa and Resort, grab a quick bite to eat at Pangea Cafe and then see the 8 o'clock showing of The African Company's Richard the Third.



The play wasn't actually Shakespeare's Richard the Third. It was a story based loosely on Richard the Third, but it was really about an African American group, composed of people who were newly freed and trying to bring some culture and Shakespeare into their lives. The antagonist is a white theatre owner who is opposed to the African-Americans trying to do their own version of Richard the Third and tries to shut them down in time for his own theatre's show. I won't give away the ending, but the characters were strong, funny, and very powerful. I thoroughly enjoyed this play.

After taking a nice little walk around the little town of Ashland to take in the cool night air, we headed back to our hotel room with a bottle of Oregon cab, and watched on my laptop a 50's version of Richard the Third, drinking wine, enjoying slices of sharp cheddar cheese, and laughing and smiling ourselves pink in the face. It was such a nice break from law school and the hectic craziness of our lives.

The next morning we woke up to a delicious breakfast of omelettes, berry crepes, baked apple cobbler, scones, coffee, and juice and took a walk around the facilities. Our hotel had a very nice garden set against lolling hills covered in autumn colors of orange, red, and bright yellow. It was so magical. We spent the morning reading the paper, finishing up some grading and law school homework before it was lunchtime.

We strolled back into town to have some sushi for lunch at Tarako's (our hotel gave us a 10% discount card and they did not disappoint us with their food) and we caught a 1:30 showing of Measure for Measure. Down below is the website's description of this play:



Who legislates morality?
The Duke's authoritarian deputy, Angelo, is hell-bent on stamping out moral decay. He reactivates outdated Draconian laws and aims his arrogant crosshairs at a young man whose fiancée is pregnant, sentencing him to death. Angelo is sternly incorruptible—until he meets Isabela, a beautiful religious novice whose desirability arouses him. Flavored with live music by the mariachi band Las Colibri, Rauch's vigorous, modern production of Shakespeare’s tragicomedy reveals what can happen when sex, religion and politics collide.

*****
The mariachi band was amazing. It added so much to the play. The actors in this play were excellent. They fully convinced us of their passion and pain throughout the play that made my spine and skin tingle, and we enjoyed many laughs and tears as we watched their story unfold.

After the play, we headed back to our hotel for afternoon tea and biscuits. We freshened up and changed into our finer clothes to get ready for a fancier dinner and the 8 pm showing of Paul's favorite, Julius Caesar. We took a walk through Lithia Park on our way to dinner and took some photos of the beautiful leaves strewn all around us.


For dinner, we had stuffed king salmon with buttermilk polenta and grilled asparagus at Chateaulin's. It was a very nice, romantic dinner by candlelight.



Anatomy of an assassination
The road to Hell is paved with honorable intentions. Adoring commoners would crown Caesar, but Caesar’s fellow politicians debate the popular leader’s ambition. Fearful for the Republic, tormented by uncertainty and driven by questionable motives, they plot an assassination. What justifies murder, and what is the shocking aftermath? The volatile, complex nature of government and the fallibility of those in power boil down in the intimate New Theatre to one pressure cooker of a tragedy.

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There was blood. There were cheers. There was a revolution. Paul said some of the scenes reminded him of Gaddafi. I agreed. It was perfect timing as our world is currently witnessing a wave of revolution throughout the middle east, and as we watched this play, we thought about how there is nothing new under the sun.

Afterwards, we went back to our hotel room for more wine and laughter. It was like a dream.

Sunday was our final day in Ashland and we woke up to another wonderful breakfast, coffee, and a walk in the garden. We headed earlier into town to have a wonderful lunch of angel hair pasta in white wine and garlic sauce, fresh bruscetta and a spinach salad with goat cheese and nuts at Martino's on a balcony overlooking the town. We then did some shopping at Shakespeare Books and Antiques before heading over to the theatre for our final play. This one was my favorite. It was a very dark, twisted, funny play about a very dysfunctional family forced to come together because the father committed suicide. It will make you laugh but it will make you weep. The mother in this play is crazy, mean, and addicted to pills. The story ends with her alone in the house, after all the kids stormed out in anger, and she murmurs to herself, "And then you're gone... and then you're gone... and then you're gone...." It was extremely powerful.



Run for the storm cellar
There’s a funnel cloud over Oklahoma, coming your way. It’s American theatre’s newest twisted family, the Westons. In the eye of the storm are three damaged sisters, their pill-popping mother and a houseful of troubled relatives. Tagged by The New York Times as “probably the most exciting new American play Broadway has seen in years,” Tracy Letts’ comic tragedy exposes the emotional destruction that rips through generations if nothing stops its path. This Pulitzer Prize winner is a domestic disaster that’s entertaining as all get-out.

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I related to so many aspects of this play, and my analysis would need to be its own blog entry.
But for now, I will just leave you with my insistence that you should make the time to go and see this play.

As we drove back, I held Paul's hand and thanked him for the lovely weekend. It was such a magical weekend, full of Shakespearean wonders and inquisitive thoughts and contemplations of life and the meaning of it all. We usually like to take walks on the wild side, so it was nice to have ourselves a change of pace and enjoy a mellow, relaxing, romantic weekend in Ashland, Oregon for some culture and fun.