sexual harassment training

So.. this morning I spent three hours sitting through a really god-awful sexual harassment training course. I was actually hoping to see a cheesy but funny video made in the 70's I've had to watch for past jobs, but no such luck. It was just a really dry powerpoint presentation and a lot of discussion about common sense scenarios. The lady doing the presentation had a fascinating accent and she's perfectly nice, but the course itself needed jazzing up. The only entertaining part about the whole three hours were some of the comments that the employees made, especially my colleague Durriya Syed. She's so cute.



I oppose this kind of course. I think it would be a much better use of our time if we were to take a class on basic manners and etiquette. Here's a link for such a course: http://www.etiquettenow.com/ The number of people I see on a daily basis lacking basic manners and etiquette proves that this is a more prevalent problem than sexual harassment in the workplace.



I was about to google some tips from the experts to include in this entry, but how about I crank out a few of my own suggestions?

Five Basics of Workplace Etiquette

1. Be a better communicator. Watch your tone and facial expressions when speaking to someone. You might think you're coming off as polite. Your non-verbals may indicate otherwise.

2. Never forget to say "please" and "thank you" no matter what your position is, who you're speaking to, and what form of communication it is.

3. No one should ever see your anger at work. Temper tantrums are only for the mother who loves you. No one else will put up with you throwing a fit.

4. When delegating responsibilites, give a reasonable amount of time for tasks to be completed, and when you're asking for a task within an unreasonable time period, be gracious about it. And remember, at the end of the day, if it's got your name on it, own it. Don't try to point fingers or place blame on others.

5. Be professional. This should be the over-arching theme and rule to abide by when making decisions about what joke to tell, what gestures to make, what clothes to wear, and what to talk about within earshot of your colleagues whether you're on the phone on a personal call or just chatting with people at the workplace. On that note, put your cellphone ringtone on silent. No one wants to hear your barn animal noises or your fire alarms.



Ugh, I can go on and on but I shouldn't turn this entry into another rant. I should mind my own manners.

So, anyway, I think the sexual harassment training was a complete waste of time. If you need to be told that making racial slurs and sexual inuendos or gestures is wrong in the workplace, you shouldn't have been hired in the first place.

There is, however, a handout that I received that I thought was pretty interesting. The handout was entitled, "The Legal and Social History of Sexual Harassment and the Development of Laws."

Being the history buff that I am, I gave a considerable amount of fascination and interest in reading this handout.

Did You Know?

In 1974, a female employee claims she was retaliated against for rejecting her boss's sexual advances. There was no sex discrimination, a trial court decides. The male supervisor, the court says, merely solicited his subordinate because he found her "attractive" and then retaliated because he "felt rejected." Barnes v Train 13 FEP Cases 123 (D.D.C)

In 1975, female former employees charge that their male supervisor forced them to quit their employment due to his sexual advances. This is not sex discrimination, a court finds, only a "personal urge" of the supervisor. Come v. Bausch & Lomb, Inc. 390 F. Supp. 161, 10 FEP Cases 289 (D., Ariz)

Whoo! Thankfully we've come a long way from all that nonsense, huh? Unbelievable that the courts saw it that way.


***

My own experience with sexual harassment has been disappointing. I remember back when I was just a kid, I worked at Good Guys Electronics, where I was just about the only female in a retail store full of guys. We all made jokes and had fun of course, but there was this guy who had a crush on me and wouldn't leave me alone. He wasn't mean-spirited or lewd, but his persistence in asking me out and leaving gifts in my locker were unwanted. I made it clear numerous times that I don't like him back, but he wouldn't stop.

So I decided one day that I would tell the supervisor. He sat and listened in silence and nodded when I told him, it's unwelcome behavior and I want it to stop.

The following week, all my "guy buddies" stopped talking to me. One of them, who I was particularly close with, Ben, he would just look at me, and shake his head. I was totally confused. I would ask him, What's wrong? He wouldn't even answer me.

After weeks of being ostracized, (and me being totally clueless and young and dumb about what was going on), there was a company holiday party. I boldly decided to go with a bag of chips or cookies or something, determined to make peace. When I got there, everyone was already drunk. Ben came up to me and said, "Do you know why we don't like you anymore Elizabeth? Because you're not getting us fired. Nope. So you can just quit. Because we will be damned if we will lose our jobs because of you."

My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe that what I told the supervisor in confidence had been passed on, not to just one person, but the entire staff. And they all hated me for it.

What a terrible experience. I had to quit that job. I have a few more of these. But I won't drone on and on.
I think sexual harassment is common sense, and sometimes people lack common sense. But it should be more of a disciplinary thing. Or at least make it more interesting for heaven's sake.